Slashing Hearts

Wage your war, soldier. How much blood will we spill tonight?

How many hearts will we shatter just to feel like we fucking matter?

Will we do it right?

Tonight,

we go to war.

There is so much blood already on the floor.

Tonight,

we show our blessings the solid door.

Tonight,

we will slam it in their face.

Let karma put us in our rightful place.

Because we are lost.

We are so lost.

I don’t even recognize our faces anymore.

The seasons are shifting.

Summer is setting.

Winter is near.

Whatever will we do, my dear?

The frostbite won’t do us in but the frozen hearts might cause us to sin

in the dark.

Warm me up, soldier.

Take me before you decide to break me.

Take me before you start to hate me.

Take me.

Summer is long gone.

Come and hold me up

to feel the snow

before the blood seeps through

and starts to show us

the inevitable truth

we must face

in order to fall from grace.

What a disgrace, you are.

A beautiful deathly fate.

Wage your war, soldier.

With your hands tightly gripped around my throat,

may I choke

on what’s to come.

May I fall

into this icy lake

and as I drown,

you will run,

heading straight back to the lies that cannot come undone.

My body is numb.

May you run, soldier. May you run.

What a rush,

our adventures,

as soon as they had begun,

as we slashed the dreams

of anyone

who dared to stand near us.

May you run

from the blood that we spilled

as I lie here dying

because you decided

to kill the only person

who knew what you had done.

And my soul screams,

she is crying for your love,

for your forgiveness.

But you are long gone.

Winter is here

and I am freezing cold

as I drown in the crystal clear lake of redemption.

As I suffocate

in the haze of recollection.

I was such a fool to think that you would have saved me,

to think you even gave two fucks about me.

We killed together

and then you saved yourself.

This is how it has to be,

you said to me

as you pushed my head underwater

until the bubbles stopped coming.

I stopped fighting for air

and you made it very clear

that I would never see the light of day again.

Wage your war, pretty baby.

Karma will find you.

Bet money.

You cannot run forever.

Well maybe,

pretty baby,

I’ll be the one who makes your “ever after”

crash and burn

and fall to ruins.

We fall to ruins.

We fall.

We fall.

We fall.

**I do not understand this one at all. Sometimes I wonder what happens in my brain and why certain words and poems come rushing in, flooding my brain and won’t leave me alone until I jot them down. Where does the insanity come from?? What do these words mean?? I don’t know right now. But maybe some day it’ll make more sense.**