fractured face

This decade tore me to pieces.

I became multiple people

in order to survive.

I found myself

begging,

pleading,

SCREAMING

For a sign from the divine.

Something to help me understand my journey.

Something to reassure me that I’d be alright.

This decade tore me to shreds.

It created a monster inside of my head.

Depression creeped in

And then

Anxiety made its bed.

This decade tore me limb from limb.

I became multiple beings,

multiple me’s

In order to keep going.

I needed to survive.

Even when I lost my will to thrive.

I needed to survive.

I became a different person

Again

And again

And again.

And then

I woke up one day unable to recognize the woman staring at me through the mirror.

I didn’t like her.

Not at first.

What happened to my hair?

When did I become so worn?

I was so torn

Trying to love her.

This decade I’ve had to learn to like her, to love her.

I’ve had to accept what’s happened to her

And I’ve had to come to terms with who she’s become.

I’m pretty sure this journey has only begun.

There is so much to uncover

I am so far from done.

This decade I’ve lost so much,

I’ve loved so much,

I gave

So much

Of me.

And sometimes I just wanted to throw in the towel and give up.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s