Heartbreak Fever

Every time he crosses my mind, there is a literal pain in my heart. My chest tightens and my lungs suddenly forget how to release air. I know I’ve felt heartbreak before but this time it’s hitting differently than any sort of pain I’ve felt before. The thought of him causes physical pain and I’ve never had that happen before when thinking of a lost lover. I guess it’s true what they say, some people leave and they take a piece of you with them. I wonder how long this will last? I mean, I can’t even say your name without feeling like someone has stepped on my chest and crushed my sternum. I have flashbacks of your kiss or your embrace and sometimes even when I simply think about how you abandoned me and my kid, I feel like someone has taken a sledge hammer and beaten me in the face. Every inch of me aches whenever I reminisce. So I guess, I need to stop it. There’s no point. You’re not coming back and I can’t continue to hurt myself by wishing I’d get to talk to you one more time. It’s a loss. A great loss. One I may never ever truly bounce back from.

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