Lost Lover

I feel like I knew that it was over before it was actually over.

It’s like my higher self was sorting things out and preparing us for what was to come.

My heart knew it was over. Deep down in my gut, I knew.

I just refused to believe it.

Because who wants to believe that your person isn’t who you thought they would be?

It’s a shame that all these hands have been dealt.

And even though the troubling times give me great strength,

I can’t help

but hate the way that I felt.

I know I’m hard to deal with sometimes.

I know I don’t always do or say the right things.

I try my hardest to reciprocate all the love and fight for what I have and what I want.

I do my best to appreciate all the twists and turns that love brings.

But when it all begins to stand one-sided

and I’m the only one expensing massive amounts of energy and excitement,

it becomes frightening.

When love transforms into exhaustion, how much can we truly take before we break?

I deserve better. And you do too. So I have to move on. I have to live on without you.

And I guess I knew that this was coming. I guess if I am honest about this past year,

I can actually hear the warning signs, the voices are sounding more clear.

I knew change was upon us.

And ladies and gentlemen…

that’s what hurts the most.

Raise your glass, let’s make a toast.

We tried. And then you didn’t and only did I.

But we did…try…once upon a time.

It must have been something in our hearts that may not have been right.

The timing. The mountains. The high rise. The overflowing fountains.

These moments were strenuous and you refused to climb.

Eventually, you hit a landslide.

So here I stand on top, completely alone because I guess you forgot

how to love me.

Why did this have to happen?

I will probably never know.

So here’s to that…the unknown.

Cheers to the lost love that may never return.